This last Friday was my mom’s birthday. It was weird. Of course I wanted to be able to tell her Happy Birthday. Just like I’d been wanting to tell her how my son’s kindergarten experience was going, how happy I am he is working so hard, how well he is staying in control of his emotions, how he is making friends and not throwing fits. I wanted to send her a card we made, I wanted to have her here with us. I guess all the firsts after someone dies are weird. First birthday without them, first Christmas, first whatever.
I thought before that day that my son and I would go do something together after school, to get me out of the house and to kind of celebrate her a little, even if it was mostly in my heart. Then my FIL had the day off work, when all I wanted to do was be alone, and he brought a friend over without letting me know ahead of time, which I HATE because, come on, at least let me sweep and pick up a bit… you know? THEN there was no movie playing, it was too hot to be outside much, and I was exhausted.
So I loaded up the kid, went to the reservoir we were supposed to be trying to camp at the next night, and attempted to procure a spot if there were cancellations. (we hadn’t planned ahead, boy just asked to go the week before) I did, in fact, procure a cancelled spot. But I had to pay for Friday and Saturday and latter the lady made a big deal out of us not wanting to actually camp there Friday because we weren’t prepared. So, I came home, packed up our stuff all by myself with armenian music videos and two old Russian men sitting in the living room looking at girls much younger than them dance to said armenian music. AND went to the lake with my son, by myself. I set up the tent in the wind with my 5 year old’s help. I got a migraine. It rained so we sat in the tent together hanging out. And we spend the night there with my husband.
My body does not like this type of thing, but my son was somewhat happy about the camping, so I will consider it a somewhat success.
In the end we spent the night at the same camping area my mother and the rest of my family held our family reunion last summer. So I suppose it was fitting. Chaos, non planning, trying to do my best for my child, not yelling at my FIL. I think it fit the situation perfectly.